Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Young Hungerbeast Reigns Supreme

A young Hungerbeast was chosen to replace long-time Grand Champion Hungerlord Sir. Hotbeef Redsauce as the presiding Chow-Slammer of the Universe. Every 10,000 years, the current Grand Champion Hungerlord must choose an apprentice.

This year, a small Beefmaster named Ham-Hock Steamroller was chosen at a McDarnalds chowhouse in Cole Slaw, Road Eyeland. The current Grand Champion Hungerlord floated down to earth on a geyser made of hot turkey gravy and landed in the McDarnalds parking lot, where he made a large beef-fart. Many people vomited from the hellfire stench.

The Grand Champion entered McDarnalds through the south doors and he ordered a HotMan 2000 and a basket of Potato Rods. He sat down across from young Ham-Hock and observed him during his slam-feast. After the meal, the Grand Master passed his medallion onto his successor.

Ham-Hock Steamroller gave a short, but spirited acceptance speech.

"I accept this medallion in honor of my father, Warm-Pork, who passed away while trying to roast a full-grown Giraffe over a large fire pit in the bowels of Africa. Thank you former Grand Champion Hotbeef. I promise to uphold the values of Chow-Slammer of the Universe by eating Hog Gravy, Lard Bricks, Beef Hunks, and Whole Burds. Thank you, Lord."

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